Mulder's Game
by LisaDouglas
Summary: 23 years, 3 kids and 100's of X-Files later, Mulder starts a new mission in pursuit of the truth. (Story formerly called I Want To Believe).
1. Daddy Hung The Moon

Ch One- Daddy Hung The Moon

September 2015- Washington D.C. 9PM

"Mommy." Eight-year-old Molly asked, raising an eyebrow.

"What sweetie?" Scully asked, turning off the light.

A glow of yellow-green stars illuminated the expanse of the bedroom's ceiling as soon as the overhead light faded.

"Why didn't Daddy call, he was supposed to call!" The child was exasperated and surprised by her question, sincerely taken aback that her father had not called.

"Because he doesn't care anymore stupid." Maggie opined, angrily tossing her book, a copy of Ender's Game, on the floor. She turned away from her mother and sister, crossing her arms.

Scully sighed picking up the book Mulder had given their daughter many years before, for her seventh birthday. Maggie had always been the one closer to her father, the one who'd shared his interests, who'd looked like him. Molly looked up at her mother with pleading eyes, wondering for the first time if her sister's words were true. She'd always just hoped she'd been being mean all of this time, she'd been convinced of it.

"Margaret Samantha Scully..." Scully cautioned kindly.

"And that's another thing!" Maggie sat up suddenly. "He doesn't even want us to have his name anymore, just let it go Molly and go to bed!"

"Oh that's right." Molly whispered, reflecting on her new last name, _Scully_.

Maggie lay back down and angrily turned over again, this time pulling the blankets up over her head.

"She doesn't mean it." Scully soothed, tucking Molly back in, not really knowing what else to say. She didn't really know what to think herself.

Molly stared straight up at the plastic stars her father had helped her collect. At first it'd been a family project, the four diligent about getting the constellations just right. Now that they'd been rehung in their new DC apartment, the plastic heavens above where in a state of disarray.

"Daddy hung the moon, remember?" Molly whispered, pointing up at the plastic half moon as her mother kissed her cheek.

"That's right. Daddy hung the moon." Scully whispered.

The sisters went to bed, each facing an opposite wall, their hearts heavy, their eyes filling with tears. Scully sighed deeply, closing her eyes and resting against the bedroom door as she shut it. She wiped away her tears with her forefinger, trying not to focus on her sorrow. She had a lot more to deal with than her daughter's knew.

For them, it was merely the emotional hole their father had created when he'd suddenly left the family a year before. To the girls it was a mystery something to resent, to lament and more than anything, this newfound hollowness of abandonment was the kind of thing that would inevitably scar two young girls. Scully didn't know if it was harder for her youngest, for her almost teen or for her, who knew a whole truth and bore the burdens of a past they had no idea about.

Life had changed for Mulder and Scully after they gave away their son and quit the FBI, or at least, they'd tried to pretend it had. They'd gone on the run together after they'd said good-bye to their much loved little William, feeling guilty and broken about his loss but at once, happy to be together and somewhat distanced from their former lives. Neither had known what would come or where they were going when she'd gotten pregnant with Maggie. Mulder and Scully had never figured out how they'd been blessed with two normal, human girls who were happily useless to the supreme powers that hunted their firstborn. Dana's mother, for whom Maggie was partially named, was convinced that Maggie and Molly Mulder were genuine miracles, a reward for everything their parents had been through.

It'd been a happy family as far as the girls knew. They saw parents who took joy in life, loved each other and shared everything with them. Despite the obvious signs, neither child ever took note of darker side to their parent's lives. They had no clue that their mother was heartbroken, their father obsessed with something totally foreign to them, something that consumed him, causing him to slip away from the woman he loved and leave his children behind.

Maggie, who didn't understand why she'd been forbade to use her own last name ( _Mulder)_ stared straight up at the ceiling, her father's old UFO poster that said _'I want to believe'_ illuminated by the glowing plastic stars. Maggie did want to believe. Deep in her heart all those crazy stories her dad had told her were true. In her heart, her father and best friend hadn't all but forgotten her he hadn't _walked away.._. In hear heart, she wasn't half orphan now. But the Dana Scully in her couldn't see past the obvious fact that he was gone, that he didn't call, that he'd revoked her name.

Outside the door, Scully sniffled, wiping her eyes and dialing his number. She sighed when it went straight to message.

"Mulder I don't know where you are but please if nothing else, call your kids they miss you."

Scully didn't say another word, dropping her phone on the couch as she ran her fingers through her hair. She'd been through so much with Fox Mulder in the past twenty-two-years and couldn't believe he'd left and not come back. After all, he'd always come back before and been there during the hardest of times. Always.

The girls had grown up thinking, rightfully so, that their mother was a doctor and their father a stay at home dad and part time behavioral profiler when in fact, he had continued to conduct paranormal investigations all these years, even before the FBI sought out his assistance once again. Scully had always known this and was aware that it was what caused him to leave the year prior. She didn't know how to feel: she was angry with him, she worried about him, she missed him... Mulder had told her he'd left to heal her, but she just thought he broke her heart even more.

She sat on the couch with her glass of wine and picked up the phone, calling her ex once again and once again it went straight to message. She paused, not knowing what to say this time and simply hung up.

...

The Next Morning 7:45 AM

"You going to try to have a good day?" Scully asked, running her fingers through each of the girl's hair as they walked toward the school.

Maggie rolled her eyes in reply, but Scully could feel both the girls nod against her hand.

"Oh come on Maggie; your first week of middle school, you've got to be a little happy."

'You're not.' The girl wanted to accuse. She crossed her arms staring back at her mother as she stopped to buy the morning paper.

"Hey girls!" Someone called from the edge of the busy sidewalk.

The three turned, their eyes widening in just the same way when they saw Mulder at the end of the sidewalk, already bent down to Molly's level.

"Daddy!" She squealed, breaking away from her mother's grasp and running into her father's open arms. Even Maggie let her guard down and ran to her dad. Mulder laughed, wrapping his arms tightly around the girls and kissing their cheeks.

"Oh my little..."

Uneasy and still scarred, Scully crossed her arms, her paper in hand and made their way toward her estranged partner and her children.

"Dana." He said simply, half a smile on his face. "Hey, how about we go get some breakfast, huh?"

"Fox! School." Dana sighed as the girls excitedly ran up the block ahead of them.

"Scully, not at a time like this!" He looked haggard and tired and Scully was stunned to find him in such good spirits.

"What?! What do you mean..."

"This is so much more important than school! Scully it's what we've been waiting for!"

Clueless and still angry, Scully raised an eyebrow, about to protest when he kissed her. It was a long, slow, sweet kiss that left her in total surprise when he abandoned her on the sidewalk, hurrying ahead to catch up to their girls.

"You're all coming with me!" He announced. "Like when Maggie was a baby. The truth is out there and it's time to finally tell them." He said, kissing her softly.


	2. That Big Hole In Your Heart

Ch- 2 That Big Hole In Your Heart

February 14th, 2002

It was with one stroke of a pen that miracle faded into misery. It was frigid out and Scully wrapped her coat tightly around her, tears streaming down her cheeks as she stepped outside the diner. It was a miracle. One long sought after, one there'd been no real hope for until now. Scully wanted it, craved it with all her heart but found herself an unwitting recipient after all she'd endured in the past year. She couldn't do it all again. Her gut reaction upon finding out the news was to distance herself, to push the miracle away. She looked up when she heard the jingling of the bells on the diner's door to find Mulder walking out into the snow covered parking lot.

"Don't cry." He soothed, handing her one of the milkshakes he'd ordered, the one she'd been craving only minutes before.

She sniffled, laughing through her tears. "I have to cry. What if it's…."

"It's not like that. Its happy news, happy news to accompany a new life." He tried to persuade.

"I can't go through with it again, I can't…" She started to sob, he sighed and took her in his arms. "I miss my baby." She whispered.

She hated his suggestion of 'a new life' in a way she wanted one, but not one without her son.

"I miss him too."

Mulder understood that she was overwhelmed, afraid and ridden with guilt over the son they'd just given up. He was too, maybe even more so than her in some way. If anything, he felt guiltier than she. He hadn't been there. Perhaps things would've been different if he'd just been there. And although he didn't admit it, part of him was heartsick by the news and longed to be held by her just as she did by him. He was scared.

"I know it's not fair." He said. Fair wasn't the word. It was ironic, the epitome of tragedy. "We gave him up so he could have a better life Scully."

"But we're his parents. _We_ were supposed to protect him."

"It was the best thing you could've done for him. You did it because you're a great mom who was thinking of his life and his needs. You gave him that good start, in spite of the odds. We may miss him. But he's gonna be happy, and free."

Fox Mulder had wanted to be happy and free since he was twelve years old. Somehow bestowing that gift on his son had been more valuable to him than everyday he could've ever spent with the boy. He would not tell Scully that.

"He's got his fresh start." He continued. "You deserve to have one too, don't ever forget that. You have no reason to feel guilty."

She laughed through her tears, feeling she had every reason to feel guilty. "A mother's love transcends everything. Fear, danger, death…"

"A father's goes pretty far too."

"I never... I feel like I'm replacing him." She said quietly.

"This is a tremendous gift, not a replacement."

Dana put her head down, feeling the bile rise in her throat. It'd been the happiest, most tragic day of her life. She and Mulder had been on the run for months now after leaving the FBI and giving up a son they loved and longed to keep. For Scully, the admission that she loved Mulder had come easy following permanent separation from their baby son and the news that Mulder himself was alive when she'd thought him dead. Since then, she'd started to progressively feel better, to allow herself moments of happiness and accept the fact that in giving the baby away, she'd given her son life all over again. For a few months, life with Mulder had been enough. But now, on a frigid February day shocking news had rocked the couple's new makeshift world: she was pregnant.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there." He said finally, noting the fresh tears in her eyes as he spoke. He'd wondered if she'd blamed him for his absence and now he felt he had an answer.

"We have nothing." She said frankly. "No jobs, no home for a baby."

Scully imagined herself giving birth on the side of a road, taking the baby somewhere uncertain once it was born, running from danger: just as she had with William. She didn't want that. She found herself longing for something safe something more normal than she and Mulder had ever had together. She didn't know if they could have that, if they could maintain something so normal. He paused, his breath catching in his throat at the sound of her words. In an instant he was afraid, wondering what she met.

"No we don't." He swallowed hard, hoping she wasn't suggesting adoption or that other 'a' word. Mulder 's heart sank, realizing he hadn't gotten the chance to tell her how pleased he was. The news that he was going to be a father again made him feel happy and somehow free.

"Wherever we go Scully, from Quantico to the open road, we're his parents and a home for him. William too."

Dana squeezed him tighter when he said this, shedding more tears at the mention of William.

"They're both special. And William will always be our son, our firstborn, no matter where he is or how far away, or who comes into our lives." He paused, drying her tears with his thumbs.

He knew she couldn't stand it. He'd been worried for his girlfriend's emotional state all this time and despite his joy, was uncertain of his own.

Dana paused for a moment. "She can't know." She whispered, issuing her terms. "Never. Please, never, never."

"Who?" He asked.

"The baby. He or she can't know. Never. About our former work, or what happened to Samantha. And most especially about William. Protect this baby, guard her from knowledge she doesn't need to have, that she shouldn't have."

"I can't tell you how happy this news has made me. We're going to have a baby Scully. One who won't be hunted by the forces of the universe. She'll be part you, part me and nothing else." He said, lifting her chin to meet his gaze as tears streamed down her cheeks. "I would've loved to have been there. With you and our William. I've been cheated of what little time I would've had with my son. But I'll be with you every step of the way this time. I will never leave you again."

...

September 2015, Scully's Apartment- 6 PM

"What are you doing here?!" Scully finally asked, getting a glass out of the cabinet.

Mulder had shown up on the street that morning and taken them to breakfast before asking where home was and with some hesitancy, she'd given him the keys. She and the girls had returned hours later to the scent of something succulent simmering on the stove and found Mulder settled back into his old routine of making dinner.

"What do you mean Scully, I came back for you and the girls. I said I'd be back." He gently tousled his estranged partner's hair, making her feel like she wanted to pull away. He paused, sensing this. He'd been happy to come home at first. "Although, I'm not exactly getting the warmest welcome."

"Mulder it's been a year, they're a bit...look, it's not the same as working a case and having to disappear for a while you know!"

Maggie sat out in the hall listening carefully, wondering what her mother met by 'case.'

"Yes it is the same and I'm about to tell you why!"

"Why are mommy and daddy fighting?" Molly whispered, sitting down with her sister.

"Because she's mad he abandoned us brainless." Maggie rolled her eyes.

Maggie, who in some way loved her father more than anyone else, felt most betrayed by his leaving and upon his return found that she would not easily forgive him.

"No he didn't he came back!" Molly squealed.

All throughout breakfast Scully had thought intently about the night she'd found out she was pregnant with Maggie, when he'd promised to never leave her again. Like before, his presence over the past year would've made all the difference in the world to her and their children.

"Oh and I suppose this is why my daughter hates me." Mulder had been eager to come home from the moment he left and had been surprised to feel uncomfortable with his family. His older daughter would barely look at him, and the younger one wouldn't leave his side.

"This is because of Samantha." Scully accused.

"Hey, hey wait a minute..."

"They're the same age that you and Samantha were when..."

He sighed. "You know why I left."

"You left to _heal_ me what the hell does that mean?!"

Mulder stopped, throwing down the kitchen knife, staring her down intently as he made his way to her side, backing her into the kitchen counter. She inhaled sharply, gripping the ledge.

"It means everything's about to come full circle. I left to fill that big hole in your heart Scully." He whispered, his breath hot against hers. Dana bit her lip, digging her fingers into his shoulders as her forehead met his as he continued to whisper. "I found our little boy Scully and he's in trouble."


	3. UFO

Ch 3- UFO

* February 2002 in the last chapter should've read February 2003

"Why are you doing this?!" Maggie asked, watching as her father hurriedly threw the duffle bag she'd just packed into the back of the car.

It was just after dark and she was outside with him, trying to persuade him not to go forward with the announcement he'd made only an hour earlier. She'd been given no explanation and the entire thing sounded insane to the level headed pre-teen.

"Just because you're bored with life here doesn't mean we need to go with you." She said, her eyes flashing coldly.

Mulder stared back at the daughter he was once close to not really knowing what to say. In the past, his children had never spoken to him like this. Maggie had been his best friend and almost constant companion from the time she was born until the time he left. The changes in her were unsettling to say the least and he found that even given all the things he'd been through, the people and possible aliens he'd come up against in the past… he didn't know how to address his own difficult daughter. This girl, whoever she was, wasn't his same Maggie and Mulder knew that was his fault.

"Go upstairs and get a jacket, it's going to get cold when we're gone.

"Where are we even going?!" She asked as he continued loading the car.

Maggie found the cargo strange. Mulder had wanted things kept to a minimum: one duffle and one sleeping bag for her and Molly, and the same for he and Scully to share, and yet there were several other things: hard briefcases with locks she'd never seen before, a box full of food and finally a third sleeping bag. Maggie may've thought that it was just an extra, incase something happened to one of the others but instead she had the distinct feeling it was intended for someone. She was highly confused and even more suspicious. The assortment of things her father tucked haphazardly in the back of the car looked like what a survivalist would pack, or worse: what wanted people packed.

"It's a road trip." He said matter of factly, shutting the back of the car. "We don't always know where we're going."

...

Molly yawned, watching from upstairs as her mother took her hand.

"Mommy I'm tired." Molly yawned as Scully bent down to her level. She smiled, tucking her daughter's red hair behind her ears.

"I know, and I'm sorry. Are you ready sweetie?" She asked, zipping her daughter's jacket. The little girl nodded simply.

"Where are we going?"

"I don't know yet; we'll have to talk to daddy about that."

"Is something wrong?" The smallest Mulder could sense that it was.

Dana paused, the girl's face in her hands. She didn't know what to say. Her daughter's lives were about to change forever, and moreover they were taking them on a case, a real x-file, their first in nearly fourteen years and one that somehow involved the son she wanted back so badly. That's what the third sleeping bag was for: the eventuality that they might find William and bring him home.

"Mommy and daddy are going to be there, wherever you go, it'll be just fine."

"Mommy?" She asked as Scully shut the curtains and turned off the lights. "When we come back, can we move home, and can daddy help me put the stars back up right?"

Dana looked up at the plastic stars on her daughter's ceiling, noting them twinkle in the dark. None of the stars had been in the right place since they'd moved to the apartment because Molder wasn't there to hang them. Their disorder had been a preoccupation of the little girl's for months and now that her father had returned, she was all the more eager to put things in order. Dana sighed, wondering if everything else really was about to be put in order: the whereabouts of and reunion with her son, the emotions and behavior of her daughter, and finally her life with Mulder. She'd yet to admit it, but she missed him and was still in love.

"Molly, daddy and I will do our best to make sure the stars get put back in their place."

….

Two Hours Later

"She's still in that thing?" Mulder asked, confused about the presence of his sleeping daughter's car seat.

He hadn't accounted for it and didn't feel they had the room. He'd been about to toss it out of the car when Scully had come down and insisted it stay.

"Well she's little for her age and it's just a booster."

"She used to grow like a weed, she was the tallest in her class for two years, what…"

"A lot's happened with the girls in your absence. Maggie's shut down, and Molly's stopped growing."

Both the girls were asleep and by now the family was nearly one hundred and fifty miles outside of DC. Scully was tired and wished he wouldn't have brought any of this up. She'd been living alone with the consequences of his leaving for nearly a year and didn't want to tell him everything in one night: he didn't deserve all the details.

"Is she okay, is she… aren't they supposed to be out of that thing at eight? Eleven months is a long time for a kid her age are you telling me she hasn't grown at all?!"

"No, half an inch maybe. Sometimes they plateau for a while Mulder she's fine and don't tell me that you were right."

"About what?"

"Remember when you were convinced she also had alien DNA?" She whispered.

"She looked like one!"

"All newborns do Mulder…. How are we going to tell them?" She asked, looking back at her sleeping children in the rearview mirror.

"I don't know, we'll figure out a way, we always did with things before." He said, reaching over to take her hand. She was surprised when she took it and squeezed it back, running her fingers over his knuckles. They paused for a few long minutes neither saying anything or letting go of the other.

"You came back." She said quietly.

"You're my girls, of course I'd come back. I always do. I meant what I said before, Scully. I'll always come back, because I love you so much."

"I love you." She mouthed.

"You're not mad at me?"

"Of course I am but... I understand my Mulder and I know there are things you needed to sort out. I hate that you left but I'd rather go eleven months without you than go without you forever. I don't want to loose you."

He smiled, squeezing her hand, surprised she was so open about this. "You won't loose me Scully. I promise. And I know you don't like taking them out here but it's for the best."

"No, I understand." She nodded.

If there was one thing she would've changed in the past fourteen years, it was that she would've guarded William with her life and never left his side let alone given him up to strangers to keep him 'safe.' Given that, she wouldn't do the same thing with her girls now.

"Suppose we tell them and… it doesn't work out." She paused.

"It's just a risk we'll have to take." He said. "After all, we've been in the pursuit of truth for years Scully, I don't think sharing some of it with our offspring would hurt. If there's one thing I hate it's thinking about them being told a lie, about them carrying on the legacy of searching for the truth: they deserve to know."

…

September 2003

"It's going to get cold Mulder." She said, snuggling the baby in her arms.

Neither had felt it safe to settle down yet and were trying to figure out where to go. Having a baby presented them with a whole host of new considerations when it came to choosing a future home: schools, space, having family nearby… too many things to list really. Scully found it impossible to deal with a newborn living the way they were: out of a car, in various motels… and she refused to do it deep into the winter.

"I know." He said simply, leaning down to kiss their daughter's head. He held Scully and the baby lay between them sleeping. "You're telling me you're ready?" He asked and she nodded.

"We need to make her a home." She said, watching him gently massage the dome of their newborn daughter's head. "She deserves that."

"What did she do to get parents like us?" He laughed.

"What did William do?" She swallowed her tears, wishing she were taking him home too.

Every night she lay there in the back of the SUV holding her baby and wondering if her toddler could sense her still, if he missed her as she missed him. She felt so guilty being here with his father and sister and not him too.

Mulder kissed her softly, tucking her hair behind her ear as she sniffled. "Scully, its okay."

"N…" She bit her lip, tears pooling in her eyes.

"Yeah, yes it is." He whispered.

Tonight they were at a crossroads, out in the middle of nowhere under the stars with no idea where to go. Maggie was a good baby who traveled well, but that didn't matter much to Scully who longed for some sense of normalcy. Mulder took Maggie and placed her sleeping frame on his stomach after Scully fell asleep. Staring up at the stars through the moon roof, he stroked her little back softly as she snored, wondering if the truth really was out there or if he'd been wasting his life and endangering his family without cause.

He never would've thought it would come to this. That he and Scully would be together, have two children, loose one and end up on the run living in a car, not because of financial woes but out of fear for their lives and now baby Maggie's life too. Mulder studied his newborn child, a little girl who favored him in appearance, feeling ashamed for where he'd led her. After a short while the child opened her eyes, blinking as she attempted to stare back in her father's direction.

"Hey." He whispered. "Maggie girl, someone's supposed to be asleep."

She blinked simply, her eyes heavy with sleep but the stars caught them, brightening them suddenly. It was a warm summer night and the stars shone clear and bright blanketing the expanse of the sky.

"See that one?" He whispered, pointing up, putting the baby on her back so she could look up. He didn't think she could see well, being a newborn, but to him it was more the spirit of the effort that counted. He wanted to share so much with his daughter. "See that it's Perseus Mags, and Aries." Mulder leaned down to kiss the baby's head just pausing there for a few moments until he heard her whimper.

She was still staring straight up at the sky and she fussed and he looked up, horrified to find an enormous stealth-like UFO hovering overhead. Maggie was enthralled and frightened all at once and Mulder's immediate reaction was panic. He wanted to scream or call out but found himself unable to breathe. He held the baby tightly, preparing to hide her underneath him, as if that would stop an attempt at abduction anyway. Suddenly though, the craft moved on and quickly passed them by. Mulder let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and kissed the baby again, realizing he was shaking. He cried as he held his daughter, thinking about the loss of his sister and son.

"He doesn't know how. But Daddy will protect you always Maggie." He whispered. "Always, always my Maggie."

…

September 2015

"Ha!" Mulder jumped.

"You want me to drive, you've been spacing out." Scully whispered.

By now it had been four hours and it was nearly midnight. Mulder had been thinking about the night that the UFO had hovered above the car, more like above Maggie. He'd never told Scully about the incident, and his fears about what it meant became less pressing only when they discovered for sure that the baby had no alien DNA... but even after twelve years the mere thought made him panic. What if, for some reason they wanted her like they did William? He looked back at Molly who slept soundly in her car seat her head slumped to the side. Scully had been right before: it did scare him that she was the same age Samantha had been when she was taken. He worried there was a connection, a reason he still didn't understand. Especially since, despite being the image of Scully, Molly reminded him of Samantha a bit.

"No, no I'm fine." He assured.

"You don't seem fine."

"It's good… it's… it's good."

"Mulder I..."

"Where are we?" Maggie asked groggily as she sat up in her seat.

"Yeah." Molly agreed.

Mulder and Scully exchanged glances, surprised they were both awake. The girls were groggy and more than half asleep still.

"Well, almost to North Carolina..." Mulder explained.

Suddenly the car stopped, all power sucked out of it in an instant. All the lights went out and they were left in the pitch black of the night save the light that blazed from overhead.

"Mulder!" Scully exclaimed.

Mulder tried intently to start it again when a high-pitched frequency struck, causing the girls and their mother to cover their ears and start screaming, overwhelmed by the sound.

Suddenly the sound stopped as quickly as it came and the car turned its self back on. Scully sighed with relief as Molly cried in the back and Maggie began to panic.

"I was afraid of this." Mulder sighed, pointing at the clock. "Look Scully, we lost ten minutes that time."

"WHAT is going on here?!" Maggie demanded, putting her arm around her sobbing, now fully awake sister.

Maggie watched as her parents exchanged glances, noting her mother seemed nervous.

"Mags." Her father began, turning around to face her.

"Oh baby, come here." Scully soothed, reaching for Molly who eagerly crawled out of her seat and into her mother's arms.

"WHAT is this? Is this why you brought us out here? Is this why you have armored cases? Why we have to sleep in the car?"

"Mags, How much have I told you in the past about extra-terrestrials?"


	4. Confession

Ch 4- Confession

July 2012

Scully was always hesitant when Mulder took the girls camping in the yard. For them it was a summer pastime looked forward to all throughout the rest of the year, an event almost venerated. But something about the tradition made Scully feel tremendously insecure, as if Mulder and her girls were open and venerable to whole of the universe. She watched from the doorway as the three grabbed their sleeping bags out of the tent and laid down under the vast expanse of the rising stars.

"Scully, come down here, don't ruin the party!" Mulder called from his place in the grass.

It was dusk and time to choose whether or not to turn in or remain out in the open.

"Yeah mom, come on!" William urged as he ran by, his sleeping bag in hand. Scully watched him as he jotted down the porch steps and into the yard, joining his father and sisters.

"Scully?" Mulder called her name again, causing her to jump.

Her breath caught in her throat and she looked every which way; coming to the painful realization that William was not there with them, but present only in her mind. She cried out woefully, grabbing the railing but her family didn't notice.

"Come on mommy! Join us this time!" Maggie cried, begging her mother to partake.

Maggie and Molly Mulder didn't understand why their mother so fervently disapproved of their summertime campouts. The girls found it irrational for a mother who was otherwise, so loving. Why would she want to deny them one of their greatest joys? At eight though, Maggie was beginning to notice the change in her mother's demeanor when the subject came up, noting that it seemed not to consume her with anger but with trepidation so unsettling that she seemed to become someone else.

It first caught her eye when she was mid-cartwheel, but didn't sink in until she fell; back first, into the grass. Upside down, Maggie watched as her mother hugged herself tightly, uncharacteristically chewing on her thumbnail and staring off into the distance. As an adult, Maggie would look back on that particular moment with the realization that she didn't deny them their joy out of spite… but that she harbored the kind of panic and fear only a mother could hold, and wanted desperately to keep them safe from a truth they didn't know lurked ever presently all around them. A truth she longed to shield them from forever, but was going to change their lives all too soon.

"Daddy's here, it's okay!" Molly assured. "He'll chase all the scary things away."

"What can I say, they think I can do anything!" Mulder laughed, seeming greatly humored by this. "Look it's a rocket ship!" He laughed, taking Molly by surprise, lifting her up high as he fell back into the grass with her. She laughed like crazy, the range of motion almost seeming like a ride to her. "Scully, you coming?" He asked again, not looking in her direction.

Scully watched as he kissed Molly's head, still holding her high above him and Maggie jumped into his embrace as well. Sometimes, she felt like Mulder had been able to move on, unafraid, and live a life with their daughters that she wasn't part of. It was as if a piece of her wasn't there with them, but in limbo somewhere with her lost son, back in a time when it was just the two of them going through hell.

Then there'd been no Mulder there to protect, defend, and help chase the scary things away. Scully figured that the disconnection with her daughters in these moments was her cross to bear, her punishment for not sticking by her infant son. After all that had happened, it shouldn't have been a surprise to her that part of her was lost too: that she could and would never be the same again.

...

September 2015

"No!" Maggie protested, her words almost seeming to shake the car violently as it sped down the highway.

Everyone froze awkwardly amid the preteen girl's angry outburst, almost afraid to move, her parents washed over with shame, her sister oddly unreactive. Scully felt almost numb now that they'd broken the news: it was the same numbness that'd consumed her every time Mulder took the girls out camping. The knowledge that the truth, written out in the stars, and her children were in that close of proximity made her feel like she was freefalling.

"No you can't be serious!" Maggie started to cry. "Mom can we check him into a 24-hour psych ward? You're lying to us! That's not the truth! It's not why you left!" She cried, livid over her father's words. "That can't, that can't be the truth!"

Scully found it ironic that her daughter had such a violent reaction to learning the truth her father had dedicated his entire life to discovering.

"Maggie…" He tried to reason.

"You're lying to me!" She accused shakily.

Mulder and Scully exchanged saddened, defeated glances. They'd considered this moment and tried to plan how it might play out ever since Scully had first gotten pregnant with Maggie. This wasn't how they'd wanted it to go, to say the least, and they weren't even done yet.

"Maggie it's all true." Mulder stared straight ahead at the road, his voice displaying no sense of emotion.

"Is he nice?" Molly asked suddenly, looking up at her mom.

"Who?" Mulder's hand hit the steering wheel in frustration. Scully, who was beside herself, said nothing.

"William." Molly said simply, causing her parents to stop.

While they'd painfully explained to the girls that they had an older brother: they had not once said his name.

"How'd you know his name?" Mulder raised an eyebrow.

"I..." The girl bit her lip. She'd known about her lost brother for a long time now but didn't dare mention it, having understood that only something truly awful could've made her parents give one of them up. "I heard you talking about it once in the middle of the night." She covered. But it wasn't true; she didn't know how she knew, only that she simply did.

Molly had discovered it several years before, back in first grade when she was assigned to construct a family tree and had accidently written him in; hastily erasing his name before it could be discovered. She'd started at the previously marked line for a long time, finding that it almost called out to her and somehow she just knew who he was and that his name had nothing to do with her grandfathers who'd both been called that.

"Let me out of the car!" Maggie begged.

"No!" Mulder and Scully shouted at once.

"Please. This is too much. I don't trust you!" She cried reaching for the door. "I don't..."

Mulder put the child safety lock on the back door and continued down the road despite his daughter's protests. Maggie felt extremely unsettled, almost panicked and didn't know why. Meanwhile, it baffled Scully that one of her daughters would be so reactive and the other so oddly calm about such a huge confession.

"Don't worry, I trust you mommy." Molly whispered in her mother's ear, wrapping her arms around her neck, holding her tight.

"You have a brother." Scully said matter of factly. She clung to Molly for comfort, swallowing the lump in her throat. "Your father and I had to give him up because of the nature of our work at the time..." She took a breath, unsure how she'd even managed saying it out loud and even more worried about how they would explain the rest of their fantastic tale.

"I'm sorry." Molly whispered. "Mommy I'm so sorry."

"You're a doctor, what are you talking about, 'the nature of your work'?"

"Daddy is this why your name used to be Spooky?" Molly asked.

"It would seem that this one knows a bit too much." Mulder remarked. "And that the other doesn't want to believe."

Maggie stopped, the expression making her think about the ratty old poster she'd inherited from him when he left. Belief had always been an odd force in their house: a source of unity and divergence at once. There was her mother, who had strong religious convictions, ones that her father almost completely discounted, and then her father, who'd always strongly encouraged the gift of being able to question the world around and never take anything at face value. Maggie had always felt convicted to heed the former, but practice the latter with a kind of vigor that had made her skeptical, fantastical minded father proud. She'd always trusted his way of thinking, and felt that he was her hero, but this time she thought he'd gone too far.

"Next your going to tell me something crazy about aliens and that those crazy stories…" Maggie stopped, biting her lip.

"That those crazy stories I always told you were true?" Mulder asked.

"No…" Maggie began, shaking her head. "No aliens aren't real!"

"Maggie…"

"No!" She almost started to panic.

"Damn it Mags, enough!" Mulder spat, jamming the breaks.

Scully and the girls screamed as the car came to an abrupt stop in the middle of the road once again. Mulder turned around to face his daughter, studying her as she shook, her eyes wide in fear and disbelief.

"Daddy no." She whispered shaking her head as if she were begging him to tell her it wasn't true.

Something about all of this scared Maggie to the core. She didn't know what it was, but her mother recognized it as a kind of unacknowledged inner knowing.

"Mags." He said quietly, holding out his arms. The confused girl got out of her seat and into her father's embrace as best as she could, anxious to be in his arms even though she was still confused and angry with him.

"Daddy please tell me it's not true." She sobbed, understanding everything now, even what had yet to be explained.

"I love my three girls so much." He said calmly. "I didn't leave you to leave you, or because I was having fun. I left to keep you safe. I changed your name to keep you safe. I left because it was time, because my son was in trouble and I could feel him calling out to me."

He looked at Scully out of the corner of his eye, noting that she was crying silently. She'd felt their son calling out to her every moment since she'd left his side, and for too long the sound had been deafening.

"All those stories I've been telling you since you were tiny, about seeking the truth. About the aliens, the bad guys, the FBI man and woman… it's all true and it's all about mom and me. You see Maggie, I've spent my whole life in the pursuit of the truth and its cost me dearly. I know what its really like to be lied to and it's why I've told the two of you the truth every single day of your lives, whether you knew it or not."

"We never thought we'd tell you this soon." Scully whispered her face buried in Molly's hair. "Or in this way."

Molly could sense her mother's angst and even at eight, possessed the insight that she'd never wanted to include them in this truth.

"But your brother, needs his family's help." Mulder continued.

"Next you're going to tell me I have a sister who needs my help too."

Scully thought her heart stopped for a moment when Maggie spoke, the child's words making her think of her first baby: Emily. Mulder and Scully had agreed long ago that no matter what happened, the girls would find out about their brother, but never their sister.

…

A few minutes after stopping in the middle of the road, Mulder found a spot to park for the night. Maggie was in shock and Molly consumed with wonder but they managed to fall asleep before their parents had even had the time to climb back in the car and zip themselves inside of their shared sleeping bag.

"There's something you're not telling me; isn't there?" Scully whispered, laying her head on his chest.

She closed her eyes, her mind put at ease by the sound of his heart against her ear. If nothing else, tonight would be the first she'd spent in his arms in a full year, and despite the horror the day had brought, and the many questions that lingered in her mind, her time in his embrace would count for everything. She wouldn't admit it, but it always had.

"What makes you say that?" Mulder asked even more quietly.

"You came back for me and the girls so quickly Fox." She spoke, deciding she had to settle the score and know what was truly coming before shutting her eyes.

Mulder looked over, ensuring that the girls were truly asleep but didn't say anything.

"They're in danger aren't they? They'd have to be for you to come like this. Please don't tell me someone wants my babies."

Mulder reached up, brushing her hair out of her face as he looked down intently, lovingly into her eyes. She stared back in awe, her eyes widening, brimming with tears as he pressed his forehead against hers. He sighed, seeing the years of pain and the stress of truth seeking written across her glossy blue globes. He felt shame for all the sorrow he'd brought her: for William, for Emily, and everything else. It was no way to treat the mother of his children, or the love of his life.

He brushed her cheek with his thumb, wanting simply to kiss her, but instead bracing himself for the words that had to follow.

"Oh Scully." He swallowed. "It's not just them. It's us too."


	5. To The Ends Of The Earth

Ch 5- To The Ends Of The Earth

June 2003

"I'm sorry about everything." He said, rubbing her back as she hung her head.

"What do you mean?" She moaned.

It was dark and he reached out to cup her cheek, studying her expression via the soft glow of the campfire. She hadn't said much in the past few hours and her silence made him ache with guilt. It was a warm, early summer night and he'd decided to camp out instead of having them sleep in the cramped car that had become home over the past few months.

Scully, who was achy, tired and sick of being on edge, was not enthused about his choice to take her out into the woods that night. After months of life on the run, and almost as much time being pregnant again, she was anxious for the softness of a bed, and the warmth of a real home. She hated to admit that some part of her was nesting, wanting desperately to settle into some semblance of a normal life. One that didn't, in its very nature, incite the kind of provocation that had cost her her son or that brought her and Mulder to this wretched place before the campfire.

Even so, Scully said nothing burying her resentments deep inside and allowing him to hold her as they stared up quietly into the crisp, dark sky. The stars, in their infinite number, shone brightly above; their light seeming like a promise to Scully in the depth of the dark. It reminded her of the bible story, of how God had promised Abraham he'd make his descendants as numerous as the stars. She clung to Mulder's shirt, staring up, daring to hope that she could have even just a sliver of that kind of promise: of a kind of hope.

He said nothing for a few moments, knowing her so intimately that he could sense her fear and her anger even in the way she rested against him. She laid her hand on her side, studying the stars, not wanting to shut her eyes for fear the darkness might settle in for her and her baby a final time.

"The morning sickness, the back pain, the worry, the running… I'm so sorry." He swallowed hard, knowing it was much more than this.

"It's not your fault Mulder. None of it."

She didn't mean that. Tonight she was upset with him for going too far, for getting them there, for giving her two children she could not keep, for getting them disgraced and fired from the bureau, for turning them into hopeless wanderers.

'At least if we were Bonnie and Clyde we'd be having some fun.' She wanted to say, but bit her tongue, mostly because she knew his likely reply.

'Oh come on, I think anybody would find it funner to be Mulder and Scully."

"Yes it is. It is my fault." He said quietly.

Mulder didn't see hope in the stars on that night but instead found truth etched out in mass for the whole of the universe to see. For him they weren't a light in the dark but simply a reminder that not everything could be so crudely manipulated by the will of man.

"Do you want this baby? Really?" She asked.

He'd said he wanted it, that they would fight to keep it and succeed against the odds. After all, he'd posited: this child wasn't wanted by dark forces like it's older brother. But Scully had lost trust in him and was still skeptical. Most nights, tonight included, she couldn't see an option besides another loss and the grim prospect made the whole of her ache.

"I love this baby. I love this road we're on." He said smiling into her eyes, meaning to tell her he loved her too. "I know you don't think it but I want a family with you, I've had one, you and me for a long time… since I've known you really."

She wanted to laugh, how could he feel anything for their road but anguish? She paused, considering his words, realizing that no matter how angry she got, how powerful the worry became… or even how all encompassing the pain came to be she didn't really regret the road, or her choice to walk on it with him; so long as he kept his newfound promise.

…

September 2015

"You promised." Scully whispered, staring straight ahead as Mulder drove. The hum of the engine and the rocky gavel beneath the tread of the tires filled the awkward spaces between their almost terse exchanges and forced silence.  
"How's that?" He asked, not hearing what she'd said.

"Please just tell me we're not going to Uncle Bill's. He's a jackass." Maggie interrupted from the back of the car.

Mulder looked back in surprise at his daughter's choice of language. "Since when does she talk like that?!"

"Since you left." Scully shrugged.

Mulder raised an eyebrow before continuing. "Well Mags, you're not wrong: your Uncle Bill is a jackass."

Bill Scully Jr had never approved of Mulder and liked him even less after he'd gotten his sister pregnant three times and still not married her. The very traditional man had never considered that his independent sister had been given the offer to become Mrs. Spooky and had said no more than once.

"Can we go home?" Molly asked. "To the real home?"

Mulder and Scully exchanged glances; surprised she asked them that.

"Oh… honey." Scully began.

"After the mission." Mulder promised quickly.

Scully paused, staring back at him, wondering if he thought it would all really be that easy. He'd said it so nonchalantly, as if she'd asked to go out for ice cream after her soccer game. This was a little girl, with separated parents asking for her home back. It was the most serious of things.

Scully said nothing in reply and turned to look out the window, wondering if he'd make good on his promises to her too. He'd already broken one: that he wouldn't leave again. She wasn't sure that this abrupt reappearance or humble reason for having disappeared absolved him of guilt in this scenario or not. She didn't know that she cared much if he succeeded in remaining true to his second promise: that she'd never have to give up a baby again. Scully didn't care what happened to her so long as it meant that Maggie and Molly were protected, and that William could be free of whatever wanted hold over him.

Scully had gone to sleep the night before without knowing what wanted them now or why. She had her theories of course, but he refused to confirm a thing; telling her he'd explain when they got to where they were going, an explanation that made Scully want to jump out of the car and always had.

"You know it's always been this way." She said, finally sick of everything.

"What has?"

"With me following you and you explaining later!" She burst, seething as she looked back at him, wanting answers.

He laughed, seeing right through her. "I love you too Scully."

"You know maybe I have spent too long following you to the ends of the earth." She threatened.

"No." He smiled. "You'll never give it up."

"And you'll never give me an answer!"

…..

Maggie and Molly presented great difficulty for their father as he drove west in a seemingly aimless direction. They wanted to know everything about the road their mother and father had been on before they were born, and like her, had unanswered questions about where they were going now. Molly kept most of her thoughts to herself, torn between fear of the unknown and the thrill of adventure seeking. Mulder told his daughters his stories as he always did, omitting any details that might hint at their current mission.

Scully analyzed the fantastical tales he told that day, scrutinizing every one she could manage, detail by detail. She thought about what he left out intentionally and tried to piece together enough clues to map out his current frame of thought. It'd been something she'd done many times in the past when she'd known he was straying from her, from the kids, turning his back on them in favor of an X-File. Once or twice before, it'd been successful but it wouldn't be today. He was leaving her out in the cold, something that was unsettling for even a seasoned agent and horrific for a woman who considered herself a mother now and not much more.

"You're beginning to make me wish I'd gone another way." She said.

Hours had passed. The sun began to set and he insisted on camping outside that night. Scully was of course uncomfortable with the idea, the girls a lot more enthusiastic. She'd found the car cozy, they'd thought it cramped. The sisters went down to the stream to play in the water, leaving their parents alone at the campsite. Normally, the former agents would both be a bit skittish about letting them wander off in the woods (knowing full well the hellish things that can happen there), but could hear them playing in the foreground, the sound of their laughter serving as a background to their parent's bourgeoning argument.

"What's that?" He asked, beginning to build a fire. She sighed deeply, realizing it was no use with him. "What? You wish you'd stayed with Bill when he asked?"

Bill Scully had tried to force his sister to abandon Mulder and move in with him when Maggie was just two weeks old.

Dana said nothing in reply.

"I see how it is." He said, accepting her silence as a yes.

Of course she hadn't wanted to stay with her brother when he'd asked. She'd known for a long time that she'd been made to follow this man to the ends of the earth, even if she wouldn't admit it now.

"I've said it to you before." She reminded.

"You have." He knew what she spoke of. It'd happened after her cancer. "Scully I…" He sighed, turning to her.

"I follow you to the ends of the earth." She said, running her hands up his chest as he approached, feeling the chiseled muscle, smooth and unyielding, glide easily under her palms and the fabric of his shirt. "And you tell me to believe the truth is out there. Like before, I need you to give me something. _Anything_ just a reason to go on with you."

Fox paused, understanding her pain, that love wasn't enough now.

"Scully I promise that…"

"Mulder you made a lot of promises. You promised no more X-Files. You promised you wouldn't leave me again. But you're so in love with the road we're on now, aren't you? More than with me, more than with the girls."

Mulder said nothing further and pulled a picture out of his pocket handing it to her. It took Scully nanoseconds to figure out who it was. She pressed her fingers gently against her hand, tears springing to her eyes. "Oh my baby." She mouthed, speaking barely under her breath.

"Yes I'm still enjoying the road and I'd follow it to the ends of the earth _because_ I love you." He paused, she nodded and sniffled, still feeling it wasn't enough.

"Someone has to save the world Mulder." She said, looking up from new the picture of their lost son. It was a treasure to her and it pained her to pry her gaze from it. "But does it have to be you? Us? Him?"

"Well that's what this is. I've told you a lot of things Scully, I won't deny that. I've made promises I haven't kept. I've been unfaithful to you with something I promised I was done with, and I'll admit it, William wasn't my only reason why."

"Sometimes I think you're sick."

"Once upon a time that solicited a response more like: 'that's how I like my Mulder.'"

She paused, staring back up into his eyes as the sun started to set behind him, the glow of the campfire clashing with the sinking light of the sun. He was right, once upon a time, that had been the Mulder she'd loved. Perhaps he was right, she couldn't expect him to just… change, or give it all up. He was a man endowed with a purpose.

Scully stood on her tiptoes, her nose against his and whispered. "Someone does have to save the world. I just hope that that doesn't mean you have to fall off the edge of it."

Years before, she'd been given a choice. William or Mulder. She'd sent her baby away to keep him safe, and while she loved him more, as a mother loved a child, she was more in love with Mulder, even now than was characteristic of her to acknowledge. Logically, if faced with separation from either Mulder or their children, she'd choose to stay with the children. But in her heart, she could not accept the notion that she would have to loose him. She thought it would break her in a whole different way and over the last year, it had started to.

Mulder swallowed nervously, fear obvious in his otherwise determined looking eyes as he stared back into her face. "It's been a long road Scully. For both of us. I don't know what's ahead, but I do know that this will be a journey of completion."

"Mulder?" She asked, alarmed after pausing a beat. He stopped, stepping forward instinctually when he heard nothing. "Mulder oh my God where are the girls?!"


	6. Abduction

Ch 6- Abduction

May 2007

"Maggie." Mulder whispered, bouncing her on his knee. "Do you see right there on the screen? Mags, Mags look at that." He laughed, his delight obvious in his tone. The four-year-old looked away, disinterested in the strange proceedings at hand: in the grainy image on the screen, on her mother's round middle. "That's your new baby sister. You see her?" He whispered.

Maggie sighed. She had known for a while that her mother was having a baby and what that meant. For the most part, she was unenthused. As far as Maggie knew, she was a doted on only child who spent the majority of her days at home alone with her father. She was more than attached to him and was having a difficult time dealing with the notion that she'd have to share him with someone other than her mother.

"Bleh!" She said, pointing back at the screen.

"Bleh?" Scully laughed, turning to her daughter as she caressed her belly. "Maggie, Mommy doesn't think it's very bleh."

"No Maggie, not bleh." Mulder laughed.

"No it's not bleh baby, its Molly. Your sister."

"I want bwother." She pouted without hesitation. She clung to her dad and quickly turned away.

Scully paused and Mulder winced at the sound of their daughter's words, seeing them reflect painfully in her eyes. She reached out and took his hand, squeezing it hard. He rubbed it softly feeling her need and her anguish at their daughter's words in the way she gripped his hand. Mulder's heart sunk and his joy over the new baby turned to sorrow over his lost child in an instant.

In particular, he saw Scully's pain over William (something triggered by almost anything imaginable and made acutely worse by Maggie's persistent requests for a brother) as being his fault. Mulder knew that he should've done more to keep him with them, and occasionally, he confessed that to Scully, even though both of them knew he couldn't possibly have done anything more than what he had. Now, he was reconciled to living with the burden: to owning it all his days.

Mulder swallowed hard, trying to shut out his own thoughts. He turned to Scully concerned, noting the tears in her eyes as she watched the baby.

"You okay Scully?" He asked, wiping the hair out of her face.

She sniffled, squeezing his hand with a new strength. "She's strong Mulder. She's happy and she's strong."

Mulder leaned over and whispered, so that Maggie and the technician couldn't hear. "Of course she is. She's yours. Never forget that all of your children are so strong."

….

September 2015

Maggie sat paralyzed in front of the campfire, the world shut out save for the sounds of her mother's tormented cries and her father's silence. She was alone with the dark, her twisted thoughts and her guilt. Maggie didn't know what had happened out there in the woods. She couldn't remember anything before her parents had found her, alone, screaming and covered in mud. One moment, they'd been playing in the creek and the next: darkness.

Now, warm in front of the fire, Maggie's guilt was eating her alive. She was supposed to be watching her, how could she have let this happen? At the same time, she could remember all the rest of it very clearly: she hadn't wanted a sister, not ever and the truth and the memory of the many instances she'd expressed it over the years washed over her with shame.

She remembered a time without her baby sister, but barely. She paused for a minute, trying hard to think back at what seemed like so many years for her. She knew that before she was in school, before Molly came, she stayed home with her dad while her mother worked. Maggie could remember being doted on in those days. It seemed to her that she was the center of his universe, and so of course she'd resented Molly's intrusion on their private little world.

But there was something more sinister at the core of those times Maggie struggled to remember. Her earliest recollections were delightful ones. It seemed like nothing was ever frightening in those early days. There could be no adversity, and every little scrape or tummy ache was kissed away by the love of joy-filled parents. It was the polar opposite of the world that Mulder and Scully had lived in for years, the world they'd been forced to surrender their son to. But Maggie could recall faint shades of darkness even in the midst of blinding light. They flashed in her brain haphazard almost like a raging electrical storm and seemed to haunt her at the strangest of times. Mostly they were just random images: Dad crying in front of the computer, kicking the trash can with his bare foot in frustration when she was supposed to be napping. Mommy looking longingly at a picture she kept tucked a way in a drawer she could not reach. Daddy on the phone, yelling at a man about things she didn't understand: things that frightened her to the core.

And then sometimes, they'd go out. Maggie remembered being afraid of the strange men her father would meet in the city, sometimes on a random sidewalk just for a matter of moments. She found herself most frightened, and yet most intrigued by one man they meant almost routinely. Even as a toddler, she picked up on the fact that her father seemed to loathe him the most, and yet somehow there was a trust there he didn't have with the others. He always gave credit to the smoking man's words and despite that she remembered all of this in little fragments he'd been the thing she'd never forgotten.

Sometimes they'd go to a shop or an office or any number of places and ask strangers questions. Maggie hadn't known what was transpiring, only that her father and these people always seemed to talk in code. Tiny, and tucked safely in her father's arms, she recalled knowing that she was safe only because she was with him. Maggie never doubted that he would _always_ protect her that this trust would be unbreakable, but now, on the night of her baby sister's disappearance her mind was focused almost solely on these patchy memories.

She searched her mind, trying to decipher any true meaning from them but drew a blank, knowing only that there was a connection. Maggie looked over at her father who sat on the other side of the campfire, his face in his hands. Unlike her mother he was silent, his anguish written in his expression. He didn't need to cry out to the heavens for help. Maggie understood that like her, he searched the soul that resided inside: the bottomless pit of anguish and confusion, for which there was just a bit of good, a touch of light and a bastion of courage at his very core. Maggie saw her father as herself and noted that his expression was one of sorrow not guilt.

"What have you done?" She whispered.

Maggie knew that as she'd grew older, his _work_ became much more frequent and that baby Molly accompanied him on whatever meetings he went on while she was at school. Over time, the girl had kind of forgotten about the mysterious nature of her father's meetings with these people, with the phone calls, with everything. But tonight opened Maggie's eyes. Knowing what she knew now, about the true nature of his work, and the former life her parents shared, Maggie realized he must've been working on X-Files all this time and behind her mother's back. Maggie felt betrayed by the notion, and within seconds, she realized he'd pushed her out into the cold as soon as she was old enough to question and remember… the idea crushed her and made her feel abandoned all over again.

Maggie was tired and turned her back to her father as she rolled onto her side covering herself in her blanket. She closed her eyes and gave a deep sigh; trying to sleep, but as soon as she shut out the darkness of night, the even deeper darkness of the reality at hand swept over her and the excessive beating of her heart worsened. How could she simply sleep without Molly? With her out there somewhere? She was used to having the much younger girl at her side and realized that even in the quiet of night, something felt wrong without her there.

" _I'm glad we're here_. _"_ The little girl had whispered the night before. Maggie sighed, rolling her eyes as the little sister who loved her wrapped her arms around her waist and settled in, happy to use her chest as a pillow. Maggie had almost always discounted how much Molly loved her. _"I didn't wanna be in school without you!"_ She continued, hugging Maggie tight, referring to the fact that the older girl should've started middle school that day. _"I love you!"_ She whispered, happy to share a sleeping bag with her.

Maggie had said nothing. "I love you." She whispered into the night, feeling lonely alone in her blanket as she shut her tear-filled eyes.

Scully couldn't stop crying. She was angry with Mulder: an overwhelming but secondary emotion. She loved her children more than anything, not one more than the other, but Molly was her baby. How could Molly have been taken after all they'd been through? Scully cried, remembering how little and innocent she seemed when they left Washington a few days before. The little girl had put on a brave face, fueled by her excitement about the dangerous, somewhat mysterious adventure. Scully tried to shut her mind off, not bearing to think of Molly in that way.

"She's baby. But she's my baby." She whispered through her tears. "She's strong. She's strong she's always been strong. My baby."

Meanwhile Mulder wanted to scream and never stop. _They'd_ taken her and it was his fault. He'd known it could be coming. It was why he'd come home to collect his family. He'd been sure they'd all be safer at his side and figured he should've known now that he was wrong. He couldn't _save_ any of them but he'd have to. Mulder swallowed hard, watching his oldest daughter try to sleep and saw himself lying there. It was like looking in a mirror or through a portal in time. She was twelve and haunted, her sister eight and missing.

Mulder saw his life dissolve before him, his love pull away, his daughter turn to obsession, all because she was him in every way. Mulder couldn't believe that he had let it happen again: Samantha, William, Molly … only this time, he couldn't let mystery have the final word. He wouldn't. He'd felt a responsibility for Samantha, a tug in his heart for William, but his whole soul longed for his Molly's return.

"You promised me I wouldn't have to loose another baby!" Scully spat bitterly, shaking with resentment.

Before that night, Scully had lost three children in her life. Sweet Emily, her precious William, and just last year, a few weeks after Mulder left she'd woken up one morning to find herself covered in blood.

She'd been menopausal, or so she'd thought, and found out she was pregnant in August, on Maggie's birthday. Scully had been surprised, ecstatic even and had planned a special evening to tell Mulder, but he'd made his exit before she'd had the chance. The miscarriage of a much-wanted baby had been a hard loss for her: especially when her partner had just abandoned her.

Scully secretly blamed him for the loss of that child too: thinking that perhaps if he hadn't jarred her to the core by leaving, she never would've lost it in the first place. Scully thought on that now, feeling a deep loss for what would be her four-month-old baby, along with the fear that paralyzed her over Molly. Scully felt the need to stand up.

"And I meant it!" He yelled back. "We'll find her, I promise we'll find her!"

"I told you I didn't want this! That I couldn't do it anymore Mulder: this way of life. Our kids deserved better than this."

"Of course they…"

"They deserved better than this!" She shrilled, getting to her feet.

"Of course they deserve better than this!" He was angry now. "What do you think I'm doing here Scully? I want them to live in a better world!"

"You're putting their lives at risk. Over and over!" She cried as she approached him. "Why do you think we're even here: because of what happened to our son! What happened to our son because you pushed and pushed…" Scully sobbed as she neared him. "How much Mulder? How much is one woman supposed to take?" She cried, gasping now. "How much more can you take?" Her heart pounded so hard she thought she was going to pass out but she felt the need to speak up.

"She'll be okay. She knows what to do!" He barked.

"She's eight years old! What the hell do you mean she knows what to do?!"

"It's because she knows." Maggie swallowed hard, causing her parents to stop their argument and gaze in her direction.

"She knows." Scully inquired faintly, her words a statement rather than a question.

"She knows." Mulder finally stood. "Scully. She knows so much more than you could ever imagine."

…..

"Woah." Molly whispered quietly, her eyes sparkling as she looked up.

The little girl was groggy but she couldn't help but be captivated by her surroundings. Molly looked up, noting the ceiling above her glow a warm blue light. It called to her, but not like the night's sky that served as the harbinger of her greatest of hopes and most far off dreams. No, this glistened with a futuristic kind of glow, an almost eerie light that drew the child in and locked her there in a way she could not explain.

"So, we meet at last." Came a voice.

Molly gasped, the words breaking her attention away from the room around her. She now realized she was cold, and that the ground below her was hard to the touch and even more mysterious to the eye. She took a glimpse of it, noting first that it was dark, and second, that she could see below it almost endlessly.

"I'd say they kept you from me long enough." The man said, calling her attention to him once again. Molly shivered his words shaking her to the core.

"W-who are you?" She swallowed hard, already knowing the man's face.

He paused for a moment, taking a deep breath before forcing a cloud of smoke out of his lungs and started to chuckle despite the child's obvious apprehension.

"Fear not. I won't hurt you. You look just like your mama." He spoke. "You know and remember me, don't you?"

Molly Mulder paused a beat, nodding slowly. Her knowing this man had been a secret from her distant past. In some way, she shouldn't have remembered, but the man was if nothing else, distinctive and at the time, had been a major part of her father's work, which she'd also been tasked with pretending she wasn't privy to. It was all very difficult for a little girl to categorize, but she had it all right in her head and he planned on using that to his advantage.

"Who am I?" He asked.

"You're the…"

"No, Molly. Who am I _really_?" He implored and she knew the term he wanted immediately.

Molly bit her lip, staring up at the man and grappling with the name he wanted to be called as he took another puff of his cigarette. Molly felt uncomfortable with this, but reasoned that if nothing else, it was the truth.

"Grandpa." She brought herself to say.


	7. The Kite

Ch 7- The Kite

 _Mulder smiled deeply, laughing joyfully as he watched his youngest daughter run through the grass in the distance, her little red kite in hand. He'd just taught her to fly it and despite an initial hesitance and a steady wind, she did it masterfully. Molly closed her eyes, grinning up toward the bright sun as she ran freely through the field without a care in the world. Mulder followed from a distance, taking pride in watching her play so happily, her smile so bright that it seemed to eclipse the sun itself. The light shone brighter as Mulder neared his daughter. The sun seemed to dip down, kissing her bright red strands of hair. She turned to him, laughing so hard she almost shrieked._

 _"Daddy come here!" She giggled._

 _The light grew brighter as he approached, reaching down like massive tentacles from the cloudless heavens above and fully encompassing the child in a dark, otherworldly haze that lifted her off her tiny feet._

" _MOLLY!" He cried, running for her._

 _"Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" Molly screamed. "DADDY!"_

 _In an instant, the light became so bright that it transformed from something merely seen to something heard and felt with every possible sense, and dropped Mulder to his knees, paralyzing him in agony before sucking his daughter up into the sky and throwing him face first in the mud._

"Ha! Ahhh." Mulder sat up straight, clutching his fast beating heart as he struggled to catch his breath. "It's a dream, it's just a dream." He soothed himself, opening his eyes.

Mulder looked quickly around the campfire, spotting Scully and Maggie curled up together next to a fallen log. Maggie was fast asleep but Scully sat awake, staring straight ahead.

"Remember the kite?" She asked. "You got it for her before you left us." She paused in reflection, her voice seeming to shudder at the memory. "She flew it every day until we moved away: She thought it would bring you home." She whispered,

Mulder cringed at the thought. Something inside wanted to lash out at her, to take the blame off of himself but instead he said nothing, taking it inside and letting it seep into his heart.

"I lost our daughter." He said, his voice hoarse.

Mulder stared back at her, his mouth dry, his tongue determined. Something inside urged him to say, ' _ **You**_ gave up our son _**I**_ did not. You gave him up and gave up on him.' But against the will of his own body he resisted.

"But I will never give up on her. She'll make it Scully."

"But…"

"She's not like William or Samantha: she knows how to find her way home."

…

 _'Da-da?' Molly thought, her tiny eyes growing wide._

 _Little Molly Mulder shook in her boots, looking around terrified at the sea of pants, stocking legs and oxford shoes as all the people rushed by, practically trampling her as they made their way on the crowded pavement. Molly didn't know what to do or what had happened. The two-year-old had never been lost before. One-minute daddy had been there; right by her side and the next he'd been gone. Little did the child know, her ordeal was part of a larger experiment, the scope of which would by far surpass anything that would occur that day._

 _"Daddy!" She mumbled, shoving her fingers back in her mouth._

 _Molly didn't know what to do, but resisted the tears that threatened to fall as a new influx of people rushed all around her. The little girl turned every which way, her father nowhere in sight. But off in the distance, Molly's sharp eye caught onto one figure that stood still, almost seeming untouched in the rush of people. The man eyed her from a great distance, as he took a puff of his cigarette, finally calling out her name:_

 _"Molly!"_

"Molly." Molly jumped, coming back into the present moment with the man she understood to be her biological grandfather.

Molly had no understanding of where she was or how she came to be there but felt some how comfortable in the smoking man's midst. It was an eerie feeling that rattled Molly to the core and for the first time, let the small child understand that however kind hearted she may be she could be evil, just as all humans were. The Dana Scully in her kept her in check, reminding her not to get too comfortable, but the Fox Mulder pressed her curiosity deeply, and urged her to seek a false sense of comfort with her grandfather.

The two were seated together at a long, elegant dining table, a nameless woman serving them a dinner that was like what her mother made on Thanksgiving.

"Molly?" He pressed again, this time taking a puff of his cigarette through the hole in his throat. The imagery would've scared the little girl, but she was knowledgeable enough to understand that that's what happened when you smoked.

"Yeah?" She raised an eyebrow.

"You're my granddaughter." He began, smiling. She nodded in silent understanding having previously thought this had all been established before.

"I remember you." She said, clasping her hands together calmly.

"I'm sure you do." He paused.

It was why he'd gone after Molly and not her sister, because she remembered and understood her father's work in a way that was less like a discovery she made and more like second nature. He knew that she was the perfect combination and just what he needed: on the outside she was the image of Scully, but inside she was all Mulder.

"You're my granddaughter." He reassured. "And I just wanted to tell you, I won't hurt you in fact, I want to make it all right."

"Make what all right?" She inquired, raising an eyebrow as she started to eat.

He chuckled. "Well, you must know you have a brother."

Molly stopped and looked up at him quizzically. "Yes." She didn't give him more detail.

"Did you know you were about to be a big sister?" This question startled the child and she shook her head no. "Bring him out." He said suddenly.

Without another word or even a sound, a redheaded teen boy appeared from around the corner and stood at attention, Molly understanding perhaps even feeling who he was in an instant.

"William." She whispered, her eyes widening. Her brother in the flesh and like her, the image of their mother.

"Your parents have always been perfect together… in missions, in thinking … and in having children."

It was clear to Molly by the boy's stance that he was not comfortable there, and that he understood who she was; the idea sent a chill up her spine.

"William here was to be my protégé." He said, slapping his hand on the pale boy's back, not noticing that he jumped.

"Was? And w-were you kidnapped?" She looked up at her brother. He said nothing but she could see the desire to tell his story play across his eyes.

The smoking man laughed. "You're my grandchildren. Kidnapping is such a harsh word Molly, tisk-tisk." He teased. "Did you know your mother was ill? Back before she had William was here?"

Molly shook her head no and noted William seemed to understand and was obviously pained by the man's words.

"It was from that illness that she lost her ability to have children."

William wanted to say it. He was a keeper of truth and everything in his body sough to spew it out, but he kept quiet out of fear and the foreknowledge that the time was not right. Little sister would never understand if she couldn't be made to understand on her own.

"W-what then how…"

"I gave them the ability to have the three of you… well almost the four because I felt it was time they be happy after all I'd done… that and I needed you."

"F-for what?" Molly knew it was best not to sound nervous, but her stomach begin to flip when she saw her brother start to slowly loose composure.

"And now." The smoking man said, returning to his cigarette. "You're all going to be right here, right where you belong. To serve the purpose I had you created for."

"No." Molly shook her head. "No that's not true." She started to shake and for the second time her brother looked back at her with full, pleading eyes.

"William was to be my protégé but as it turns out, those of you who didn't know your mother's love were inferior."

William's eyes welled up with tears at the sound of his grandfather's words. He'd been stolen from parents who loved him twice over now, his adoptive parents having been murdered by henchmen of the smoking man. For many years now, he'd been the only family he'd had and while he'd missed the Van Camps, and known about Mulder, Scully and his baby sisters he'd had no way of getting to them, even though he tried. William was not defunct at all, he was honorable an indiscretion his grandfather associated with failure.

"So I needed a new protégé, a way to pass down what I have going. Your mother was pregnant last year. I had such hope for that child but I guess it wasn't meant to be. Your father always resisted me, his brother was a waste of time." Molly tilted her head in question having no clue she'd had an uncle. "Your mother." He laughed. "She outsmarted me I'll admit that. Your brother, he was subpar."

Molly didn't miss the hurt in William's eyes as it transformed into a violent anger and despite the aggression that surged through him, he didn't make a move. The smoking man continued.

"But you, Molly Mulder you and your big sister will do nicely. And soon, protégé or not, you'll all be here to serve the purpose you were made for: serve me or die."


	8. Nothing

Ch 8- Nothing

 _Winter 2008_

 _"If you'd done this when I was pregnant I would've killed you!" Scully said angrily, slamming a baby bottle down on the counter after she cleaned it._

 _A man had shown up at the hospital that day looking for Mulder. She'd been upset in an instant, but never would've thought he would agree to help the people who'd been hunting him._

" _This isn't our business Mulder." She continued when he didn't reply. "You were right all that time ago, when I was pregnant with Maggie. We have a new life. Two new lives." She slammed the dishwasher door shut._

 _"Those people need our help!"_

 _"Look. I agree with saving another agent but that's the extent of it. The only people I'm interested in saving are two little girls upstairs."_

 _"They don't need saving."_

 _"You don't know that!" She barked._

 _"Your mom can take them for a couple of days."_

 _"Yeah and what if we don't come back?" Scully, paused, seeming unable at first, to grapple with what she'd said. She gave an exasperated sigh, running her fingers through her long hair. "I'm not going."_

 _"I need you."_

 _"My kids need me." She shut the fridge and took the burp rag off her shoulder as she left the room. "Nothing is separating me and my children again. Nothing."_

 _"Scully…"_

 _"Nothing." She said, her vindictive voice fading into the distance. "Nothing Mulder, especially not the thing that took my first two."_

…

Maggie Mulder lay in the grass, so still it was if she weren't even breathing. She stared up into the sky, her brown eyes as wide as wide as saucers: devastated, spellbound.

"Maggie…" A little voice whispered, followed by an innocent little giggle. "Maggie…"

 _"Maggie, play with me!" Molly insisted, trying to wrestle her big sister awake. "Maggie!"_

 _"Get off of me! No go away leave me alone you little troll!"_

Maggie stared up at the sky, catatonic, the grass and the trees wrestling in the gentle wind that blew all around her, as guilt that weighed on her like a boulder came crashing down.

…

Maggie's thoughts swam, driving out the sound of her mother's fast flowing tears. It wasn't long before Mulder couldn't take it anymore and jumped to his feet.

"Get up, we're going!"

"G-going? Mulder, she…."

"Scully you know she's not here!"

"But she…"

"She's out there Scully." He declared.

"Oh what?! What?!" She got up, outraged. "What she's _out there_ , like Samantha?" Scully taunted as she sobbed.

Even in her devastated state, the name _Samantha_ caught Maggie's ear and she wondered who it was that she, Margaret Samantha Mulder, had been named for.

"Like someone we'll… we'll never find." Scully broke down sobbing at the words, for the first time realizing that they might never find Molly.

Mulder was crushed by the assertion, the proverbial bolder that had just fallen on his eldest daughter, having never been lifted from him. He was used to its weight, it was something that had shaped both his character and his destiny; but there were times when it grated at him, when it rubbed at his soul like salt in a wound.

Although he was angered by her words, Mulder took Scully in his arms hugging her tight and running his fingers through her hair as she cried. He cradled her, staring back over at his daughter, her catatonic state reminding him too much of his own condition after his sister's disappearance, a condition which he'd never fully recovered from.

"There, there it's okay. It's going to be okay."

"Mulder what if she…"

"Shu. I love you."

She sobbed harder when he said it and within seconds, he joined her in shedding tears as he took her face with both of his hands and lifted it to meet his gaze.

"I love you like I've never loved, like I never will love again. You're the best part of me: you complete me. Scully she's our baby: she's our baby and I promise you she will survive just like we have again and again. And we will find her, just like I always find my way back to you."

….

Molly tilted her head, studying her big brother carefully. She longed to speak to him, his red hair and kind blue eyes familiar, but the Smoking Man kept interrupting.

"Eat your carrots." He chastised, taking a moment to act like a normal grandfather.

Molly grimaced, picking at the vegetable she deplored.

"He means it." William advised.

It was the first time he spoke and it made Molly smile: even though he looked like mom, he sounded like dad.

"Now William." He chastised. "Don't intimidate your baby sister."

"No, that's your job."

"Molly, are you intimidated?"

Molly paused, gulping when he smiled at her. "No…. "

"Very good."

"Grandpa…"

He and William both looked up, surprised when she said it voluntarily. Molly had been considering it; gathering all the information she had in her little eight-year-old brain and now she couldn't help but ask a question.

"Yes Molly."

"Grandpa, are we human? Me and William?"

After all, he'd said he'd had them made.

The Smoking Man started to laugh before turning back to the cigarette that was the closest thing he'd get to a meal that night. "Of course not my cherub."

….

"It's okay my Maggie, I know you're scared, I'm scared too, but Mommy will never ever let you go Maggie: never." Scully whispered, running her fingers through her catatonic daughter's hair as she helped her climb into the car.

So many things ravaged Scully's mind in that moment: the whereabouts of her baby girl, haunting memories of her own abduction, the loss of her son, and finally, the many months that she and Mulder had spent on the run with newborn baby Maggie.

Scully paused for a moment, placing a kiss on her daughter's forehead, noting for the millionth time, that unlike her siblings, Mulder's DNA had left a very obvious imprint on her.

"Maggie I promise I won't loose you too, no matter what."

…..

Scully stared out the window as the rain poured on the speeding car. Mulder forged ahead without a thought to the campsite they left behind, but Scully was terrified, worried Molly had simply gotten lost and was out there somewhere helpless and alone in the rain.

"Scully it's going to be alright: I promise."

"I don't know Mulder what if… what if it's not alien abduction, what if it's not an X-File what if…"

"Scully, she's _our_ child. What are the odds that it's not?"

"She's my scared, innocent little baby." She whispered, almost trying to convince herself, thinking she understood what he was implying. "That's all she is."

Scully shut her eyes and all she could see was bitty newborn Molly, staring back up at her with the purest, widest blue eyes. Scully remembered it like she was still in the moment.

 _It'd come suddenly, after an eighteen-hour labor that had had no end in sight. One minute she was screaming her head off, Mulder by her side, the next, a nurse was laying her tiny newborn girl in her embrace. Somehow, she'd felt forever changed when she first held the bubbly little redhead. Even from birth, Molly exuded the joy that flowed naturally from within her heart._

" _She's so little tiny." Scully laughed through her tears, her soul sighing with the deepest peace the moment the little one was placed in her embrace: she knew Molly wholly and instanteously._

 _Mulder laughed, kissing the top of her head as he peered down at the newborn girl for the first time._

" _No she's not; she's larger than life."_


End file.
